Marriage is not just a contract; it’s a sacred union, a partnership that requires dedication, patience, and constant effort. In Islam, finding a spouse is a profound decision, rooted in balance and wisdom. The Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) said, “A woman may be married for four reasons: for her wealth, for her lineage, for her beauty, or for her religious commitment. Choose the one who is religious and you will prosper.” This Hadith highlights that beyond physical attraction, wealth, or status, a successful marriage hinges on character and faith.
But how do we make this sacred relationship thrive in a world filled with distractions, pressures, and the burden of everyday life? How do we keep the flame alive? The answer isn’t simple, but it’s worth striving for. Let’s dive deep into practical ways to make a marriage work, infused with Islamic teachings and timeless wisdom.
“The best of you are those who are best to their families, and I am the best among you to my family.” — Prophet Muhammad (PBUH)
Marriage isn’t about one person doing all the heavy lifting. In a world that pulls us in a thousand directions, it’s easy to fall into patterns where responsibilities become imbalanced. But to make a marriage work, the load must be shared. When you help around the house, you’re not just doing chores — you’re building respect and nurturing a partnership.
From washing the dishes to folding the laundry, every small act of service counts. Helping around the house is not about keeping score but about standing side by side, especially when things get tough. When both partners contribute to the daily grind, the bond strengthens.
In the grind of everyday life, these little moments matter. Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) used to help with household chores. He showed that love and duty are intertwined. The effort you put in at home speaks volumes about the love you have for your spouse. Whether it’s cooking dinner together or tackling the laundry, each task becomes a testament to teamwork, making marriage work one day at a time.
Parenthood is one of the most rewarding yet challenging phases in marriage. It’s where patience is tested, and love is stretched thin. If you’ve got kids, you know the chaos that often comes with them — sleepless nights, tantrums, endless energy that leaves you both exhausted. But here’s where the beauty of teamwork truly shines. To make a marriage work, it’s critical to be in sync as parents.
“Heaven lies under the feet of mothers,” said the Prophet (PBUH). But fathers, too, must play a vital role in raising children. A successful marriage is one where both parents are involved, supporting each other through the highs and lows. When one parent takes a break, the other steps in, seamlessly sharing the responsibility of nurturing young souls.
Helping with the kids isn’t just about surviving; it’s about thriving together. It’s about being present at the school drop-offs, taking turns with bedtime stories, and managing those tantrums with a united front. The more you step up for each other, the more you show your children what a loving, functioning marriage looks like. And in that, you’re not just raising kids — you’re building a legacy of love.
If there’s one thing that can make or break a marriage, it’s communication. We hear it all the time, but what does it really mean? It’s more than just talking — it’s about understanding, listening, and being heard. It’s about creating a space where both of you can be vulnerable, without fear of judgment.
“And We created you in pairs” (Quran, 78:8) — pairs that complement and support one another. Good communication is the backbone of that support. You’ll have arguments; that’s inevitable. You’ll disagree on things — maybe on how to raise the kids, or how to manage finances. But it’s how you navigate these conversations that determines whether your marriage thrives or falls apart.
Don’t let frustrations fester in silence. Talk to each other, even when it’s hard. Especially when it’s hard. Sometimes, just having a real, raw conversation can make a world of difference. Speak with kindness, listen with patience. In the end, communication is what strengthens the emotional bond, and that bond is what makes a marriage work.
When was the last time you spent time with your spouse, just the two of you, without the noise of kids, work, or the hustle of life? In marriage, it’s easy to get lost in routine, but to make a marriage work, you have to carve out time for each other. Life gets busy, but your relationship should never be neglected.
“Verily, the most complete of believers in faith are those with the best character, and the best of you are those who are best to their wives.” — Prophet Muhammad (PBUH)
Date nights aren’t just a luxury — they’re a necessity. It doesn’t have to be extravagant. It could be as simple as a walk in the park, a quiet dinner at home, or even just sitting together and talking. These moments remind you of why you fell in love in the first place. They rekindle the connection, allowing you to breathe life into your relationship.
Taking time out for each other isn’t just about spending time together, it’s about recharging the emotional and spiritual bond you share. Because the truth is, if you don’t water the plant, it’ll eventually wither. Nurturing your relationship is one of the cornerstones of making your marriage last.
“And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquility in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy” (Quran 30:21).
Affection and mercy. These are the pillars of a strong marriage. But life has a way of testing this — through pride, anger, and resentment. There will be times when your spouse frustrates you, when you’ll be tempted to lash out or put your ego first. But a marriage can only work when you both put each other first.
Marriage is about compromise. It’s about swallowing your pride when needed, letting go of that argument, and choosing love instead. It’s about showing up for each other, even when it’s inconvenient, even when it’s difficult. If you’re constantly in battle with your spouse, trying to win, you’ve already lost. The real win is in choosing peace, in choosing each other, again and again.
Putting your spouse first isn’t about losing yourself — it’s about building something greater together. It’s about understanding that in a successful marriage, both of you need to feel seen, heard, and valued.
Marriage is a journey — sometimes chaotic, sometimes peaceful, but always worth it. To make a marriage work, you have to be willing to put in the effort, day after day. There’s no magic formula, but there is a guiding light. The teachings of the Prophet (PBUH), the wisdom of the Quran, and the lessons from our own experiences show us that a successful marriage is built on mutual respect, love, and faith.
“The strongest marriages are built on a foundation of faith, not perfection.”
You’ll stumble, you’ll argue, and there will be days where it feels like the weight of the world is pressing down on you both. But through it all, remember that marriage is a sacred bond, one worth fighting for. Keep communicating, keep showing up, and most importantly, keep choosing each other. This is how you make a marriage work.
